Rest In Peace, Baby Preston
Baby Preston - I am so sorry. Rest in peace Angel
Trigger warning - I am not sharing his story here as it is disturbing, so if you google it you have been warned.
We are bombarded daily with the evil in this world. Most of the time, we start to feel the shock but we look away. It is easier to pretend it is not happening. We are busy, we have our own stuff, we need to have boundaries, we can't feel everything… but sometimes there is no choice but to be human, face it and feel it.
Yesterday was one of those days.
I read the Baby Preston case, I felt sick in my stomach, I tried to get on with things. I couldn’t. Something deeper inside of me said “you are a Soul constellator, look at it, look at the field”. I did, I allowed the rage to come. I was so angry I could kill.
My face was flushed red, I want justice, jail is not enough, a part of me wants the death penalty. The public hanging. I am in full blown rage. I do push ups, I move it through my body.
I claim it "I want to kill the perpetrators". I fully own the killer within.
Then the helplessness, what can I do with my limited resources? So much for the great awakening, what a joke. This world is as dark as it has always been, it’s in our faces and no one seems to do anything. I feel the helplessness… we should all be marching down the streets with pitchforks for every child that suffers.
When a race doesn’t protect the innocent we have a HUGE problem. The consciousness is so low and people are so evil and possessed they just take children for their own dark deeds.
I alternate between rage and helplessness. I don't care if I am sending them curses, I am that angry.
Finally, the well of grief, ancestral, collective, my own grief. I cried a lot, I cried myself to sleep, I am so so sorry baby Preston.
No amount of spiritual insight can take away this grief. There is no bypassing this one, there is no "thinking" here, the only thing I can do is feel it.
I wake up and light a candle “I am so sorry baby Preston, humanity failed you. May you rest in peace. I am sorry to all the children we have failed"
It’s ok to look and feel.
We can’t do it for everything but we are human. We are all parents of the next generation, Baby Preston was our child and we collectively failed him and are failing millions of children around the world.
I don’t know the solution. I don’t even want to attempt to spiritualise it right now. I am choosing to feel it for those that look away and for all the times I have looked away.